It's Like a Heatwave, Burning In My...Oh, Everything...

So, it's a million and twelve degrees down here in the Deep South, with about 5000% humidity. Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating...slightly. All I know is that it's hot. I mean, ice-water-chugging, egg-frying-on-the-sidewalk, Fall-can't-get-here-fast-enough miserable. My apartment can't seem to get any cooler than 80 degrees, and that's with the AC cranked up, ceiling fans, and one of those Hawaiian Breeze ocillating fans. The birds love it. Of course, they're tropical and I am not.

I know it's not just here, too. The whole country seems to be in a continuous heatwave this Summer, and for that, I'm sorry. I went through three or four cans of hairspray on The Night Shift, so I take full blame for any extra holes in the ozone. Please accept my sincerest apologies.

As atonement, I have compiled a survival guide to help you cope with these Dog Days of Summer. To keep things simple (and inexpensive), all products can be found at Target.

Personally, I'd like to forget about clothing altogether, at this point, but I think the people I work with would appreciate if I stayed as covered up as humanly possible. This little white dress is a fair alternative to going full-out Lady Godiva.

I like that it's 100% cotton, so it breathes, and the design is airy, but covered up and dressy enough that you could wear it to work in a casual office setting. A word of caution, though: reviewers have mentioned that it is a bit on the sheer side (so be careful of your undergarments, ladies), and that you might want to skip putting it in the dryer. They've also mentioned quality construction, comparable to Forever 21. Mossimo, $15.38, Target.com.

There have been days when it was too hot to even wear flip-flops, but shoes are pretty much a necessity in civilized society. Might I suggest a pair like these? First off, they're dressy/casual, so they're versatile. Secondly, the cork is absorbant, which...well, let's face it: feet sweat. I'd rather not slosh around in my shoes, thank you very much. Cork is also very soft and tends to mold to your foot for comfort. Mossimo, $12.99, Target.com.

I'm actually carrying this purse right now. I've had it for about three months, and love it. It's roomy enough to carry what you need, but small enough that you can't fill it with the entire contents of Mary Poppins Carpet Bag. The cotton construction allows the purse (and what's inside it) to breathe, keeping your stuff from getting too hot. It's also washable, durable, and cute as pie. Available in several colors and patterns. Merona, $7.00 (really!!), Target.com.

Please remember sunscreen!! Around here, burn times run about ten minutes. Really, I don't care what brand you use--if it's sports, kids, spray, lotion, or purple--just use something! Sunburns suck, but skin cancer is so much worse. Neutrogena, $9.94, Target.com.

I don't know about you, but lotion melts off my legs, these days. I still need something to keep them moisturized (sweat doesn't count), and this light body mist is just the thing. Put out by Soap & Glory, Girligo is a non-greasy spray moisturizer that leaves your skin silky smooth and freshly scented. I'm also in love with the retro packaging. Soap & Glory, $11.99, Target.com.

Last, but not least, let's put on a little color without worrying about it melting in the car. CoverGirl Outlast Lipstain is, well, just what it says it is. It's a long-wearing lipstain. What's cool about it is that it comes in a marker form--sort of like a Sharpie for your face. Also, unlike many lipstains, it's moisturizing, so you don't end up with flaky lips, or need to carry around a separate lip balm or gloss to put over it. CoverGirl, $7.89, Target.com.

There. We can all "glow" instead of "puddle". Now, maybe Al Gore will get off my back. Again, sorry.

*Photos by Target

CON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am not upset that I'm not at Comic-Con. Nope. Not at all. I am not scouring the Internet to find out all the exclusives I'm missing out on, all the celebrities I won't get to meet (BRUCE!!!!), and which movies are going to be heavily promoted. Nope. Not at all.

I am a big fat liar. I am DYING to go to Comic-Con!!!! Thomas and I went last year, and it was one of the coolest experiences I've ever had. Neither of us had ever gone before, so we had no Earthly idea what we were in for. Oh. Good. Lord.

Somehow, through a total fluke (okay, through me bouncing up and down like an idiot, waving my arms for attention, wearing a practically day-glo t-shirt, and, honestly, being a girl--and one who happens to know too much trivia on Galaxy Quest), we ended up getting into the Wrath of Con party at the Hard Rock Hotel. That is, apparently, THE party to get into. Joss Whedon got turned away. That's right. We got in, but Joss didn't. Daughtry was the entertainment. I had a drink at the same bar as Robert Englund. Thomas waited in line behind Brandon Routh to play X-box. The TNA Wrestling Ring was set up in the middle of the party. Zack Snyder accepted an award. Harry Knowles rode around mingling. Stan Lee made a walk-through appearance. Kevin Freaking Sorbo was there. The cake was good. We were horribly underdressed. I'm still mad that I didn't get my gift bag. It was a magical, magical evening. Personally, I would have loved it if Mr. Whedon had been let in.

Throughout the weekend, we saw panels for Burn Notice (with Bruce!!!), Family Guy, Doctor Who (and I still have a massive crush on David Tennant--sorry, Thomas), and about a million other things. I got to meet John Barrowman and totally embarrass myself. We saw Leonard Nimoy from a distance. Lou Ferigno was in a booth selling t-shirts.

Outside the convention center, we had lunch in the SyFy cafe, went to a Heroes carnival, and tooled around gorgeous San Diego. I can't wait until next year when we can actually go back. We would have gone this year, but scheduling conflicts didn't allow for it, hence the mini-break to Atlanta.



Photo by Converse



However, if I could go, I've learned from last year, and there are a few things I would have to have in my convention-going arsenal:

1) Really comfortable shoes. With insoles. And a team of hunky men to carry me around like Cleopatra. And a pony. Seriously, though, the convention floor is massive, and you will cross it several times a day. Plus, the transit system decided it didn't like running when it was supposed to, so we got to walk the two miles from our hotel to the center and back a few times. These are my pick. They're Converse, so they're good, and the Dr. Seuss design screams Comic-Con. Converse.com, $55.



Photo by Target



2) A big, roomy bag. I've had a Mossimo bag for years, and it's still in fantastic shape. My only problem with it is that it's black, and tends to get mixed up with other people's bags rather easily. The gray color and fuscia stripe on this one makes it a little more distinctive. Oh--and it mostly matches the cute Converse shoes! Target.com, $19.99



Photo by The Body Shop

3)Foot Relief. Because no matter how fabulous your shoes, your feet are going to hurt like the Dickens by day's end. By week's end, you'll be grateful the airports have those little conveyor belt walkways to ride on. While sitting down. And possibly sleeping. This Peppermint Purifying Foot Mask is some of the best stuff I've ever used. It relaxes, soothes, detoxes, and even clears your sinuses. No kidding. The Body Shop, $17

Okay, 2011, you'd better be worth the wait.