Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Are You Man Enough, Cap'n?

Photo Credit (This and All): Fragrantica
Would you like to know today's excuse for not having Disney World pictures and stories? Would you really? Okay, I'll tell you. I washed a box of dryer sheets with a load of towels, and spent the morning trying to pick flakes of wet cardboard out of my washing machine. And how was your Tuesday?

As the realization of what I'd done dawned on me ("Why the heck are there dryer sheets in here? And why are there so many of them? It looks like a whole box just...oh"), strains of Bonnie Tyler's Holding Out For a Hero echoed through my head. 

I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night
He's gotta be strong
And he's gotta be fast
And he's gotta be fresh from the fight
I need a hero
I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light
He's gotta be sure
And it's gotta be soon
And he's gotta be larger than life

Now, I have a good man--one who, believe it or not, normally handles the laundry (he's also a dishwashing wizard)--but he was at work. Even if he had been home, I doubt he'd have been any better at removing itty bitty chunks of the lint formerly known as the Snuggle box. He's a man of many talents, but his inability to succumb to brain freeze--impressive as that may be--probably wouldn't do much good in this instance. No, I needed a superhero; someone with either alien or technologically advanced powers of...well, lint-rolling or vaporizing or time travel (to keep me from being stupid and washing the darn box in the first place). Something like that. 

How do I get bit by that radioactive spider? It would be ridiculously awesome to just stare really hard at my bathtub, and clean it with my Scrubbing Bubbles-Vision (TM). I'm sure Thomas would gladly trade the minor inconvenience of a super-secret underground medical procedure to be able to, I don't know, incinerate the garbage with a snap of his fingers. My point, is that I'm sure there are plenty of times in our everyday lives that we all wish we were superheroes. Where's that darn Easy button, Staples? Well, the folks at Diesel have decided to cash in--I mean, help us out with our wishes. If you can't be a superhero, at least you can smell like one. Sort of. 

Captain America cologne! Well, again, sort of. It's also Iron Man cologne. Well, as I said, sort of. Technically, it's Only the Brave, by Diesel, a blend of lemon, leather, violet, amber, styrax, labdanum, and cedar. I haven't sniffed it yet, but it sounds yummy (bold, masculine scents mixed with sparkling, playful notes--awesome), and reviews have been mostly favorable, so it seems to be a decent product, and not just a clever marketing ploy. Of course, it is a clever marketing ploy, but at least there's a chance of getting something quality along with the kitchsy exterior. That exterior, by the way, is a fist. The original Only the Brave comes bottled in a glass fist, adorned with a Diesel logo-as knuckle ring. The Iron Man bottle is still a fist, but a shiny, red metallic one. Captain America is metallic blue with the Star-Spangled Shield emblazoned on the side. 

It's cheesy. It's silly. It's clearly a movie tie-in, and I kind of love it. What's more, my husband would love it. Heck, it might even get my 13 year-old brother to wear something other than Axe (the angels haven't fallen, yet, but he keeps hoping). That would truly be heroic. $67.50, Macy's (not online at time of publication).

1 comment:

  1. oh, that dryer misadventure sounds obnoxious as anything. sounds like the time in undergrad when the ex somehow, in trying to be nice and wash a load of towels for me, managed to wash and dry an entire week's worth of my tips.

    [pause for money-laundering joke]

    $75 in $1 bills. it was MAGIC.


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