Friday, December 10, 2010

Gift Guide: The Zombie Hunter

Hello, and welcome to this week's installment of The Gift Guide!  Tonight, I have my first publicity stint for The Night Shift, so in honor of our cute and cuddly zombies (seriously, they're freaking adorable), I thought I'd show you some gift ideas for the zombie hunter in your life.  You know who I'm talking about.  It's the person who can quote Shaun of the Dead and Zombieland, uses "Romero" and "Boyle" as adjectives, and could not only tell you how to dispatch a zombie properly (aim for the head, duh), but could also describe the process in (at times, uncomfortably) great and gory detail.  Yeah, I married one of these people.  Yeah, I sort of became one myself. 

Photo Credit:  Buy Zombie
Let's start with the all-important Zombie Survival Guide.  Yes, there is the book by Max Brooks (Mel's kid), but who has time to read a book when there's an apocalypse at hand?  Besides, your die-hard (get it?  Die hard?  I kill me) zombie-phile probably already owns a copy or two.  When things get really hairy, it's best to digest valuable combat and weaponry information in short bursts, preferably in calendar form.  After all, when the zombies come, and the world falls apart, you're going to want a nice calendar.  $12.59, Amazon.

Photo Credit:  ThinkGeek
Next, you average hunter is going to want to be able to identify a zombie.  The last thing we want is for an over-zealous survivor to accidentally mistake good old Uncle Jimmy for one of the undead.  Let me tell you, that would put a severe damper on Christmas dinner.  Nothing can replace common sense, but this shirt couldn't hurt.  $15.99-$17.99, ThinkGeek.
Photo Credit:  Amazon
Lastly,  you can't have a plan with a map, and as we all know, zombies love malls.  What better way to tell your zombie hunting loved one that you understand and appreciate them than by gifting them with their very own mall map, complete with indicators of where the zombies will converge, and conveniently located on a shirt?  That way, they can keep it close to their heart and think of you.  So what if it's not a map of your mall?  It's the thought that counts anyway, right?  $18.95-$19.95, Amazon.

In other news, I have a product review for you!  As you may recall, I'm with BzzAgent, a word of mouth advertising company.  This means that BzzAgent sends me products, I test them, then tell you guys what I think.  Good, bad, ugly, indifferent, whatever...they just want the truth.  My latest product was Tom's of Maine Toothpaste in Wicked Fresh(!).

According to the Tom's website:
Wicked Fresh!™ Long-lasting Fresh Breath Toothpaste uses powerful natural flavor oils and a patent-pending botanical extract to provide long-lasting fresh breath.
According to me:
Meh.  It's okay.  It cleaned my teeth.  I would not say that it made my breath any fresher than my usual toothpaste (Crest 3D Whitening), but I would say that my breath did not stay fresh as long.  In fact, only a minute or two after brushing, I find myself reaching for gum or a breath mint.  In other regards, it does not whiten teeth or remove stains, but it does contain fluoride and tastes pretty good.

Overall, this toothpaste is not Wicked Fresh(!).  It's just Wicked Disappointing(!).

2 comments:

  1. Hmmm...

    Zombies...

    Will Napalm kill zombies?? I'm not sure...

    I had zombie references in my post today...

    They must be running rampant...

    Brains...

    ~shoes~

    ReplyDelete
  2. yeah, tom's has never really sent me. a lot of crunchy bluster, not much punch.

    i desperately want someone to make, like, stuffed versions of the plants from plants v. zombies. that would make my life.

    ReplyDelete

Add your own ramblings, musings, or existential ponderings here--just keep it clean and keep it kind.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...