Breeze It, Buzz It, Blast It!: A Review and Stream of Conscious

Photo Credit: Sephora

About a week ago, I decided to be adventurous (and we all know how "adventurous" I am...) and try the Blasted nail polish that's new from Sephora by OPI. That is, I wanted to test out the new nail polish named Blasted, not that it was "that dagnabbit blasted nail polish." It's not blasted, it's just called Blasted...oh, I give up. You know what I mean.

Here's how it works: you paint a base color on your nails, wait for it to dry, then paint one (and only one) coat of Blasted on top. As Blasted dries, it will separate into patches of color, letting your base color shine through. Finish with a glossy clear top coat (optional, but definitely recommended).

The polish ($9.50, Sephora) is really cool. It actually does "blast" apart as it dries, and was neat to watch (yes, I just admitted to having fun watching paint dry). Blasted comes in several colors, including red, white, turquoise glitter, silver glitter, and gold glitter. I decided to go with what other reviewers had deemed the most versatile shade in the group, and the one that shows up best when "blasted", black. Hoo boy.

Photo Credit: Sephora

Let me start off by saying that I didn't hate it. I think I would prefer to try the gold glitter next time, as I think it would be amazing over a pretty bronze, but I don't hate the black polish. If you can rock the urban look, by all means, go for this. I think it'd look awesome over a neon purple (actually, I may try that). However, if you tend toward a more boho or classic look (like I do), this might look kind of silly alongside, say, a flowy tunic or crocheted Summer sweater. I have to say, rockstar nails and a choir robe was not my best look. However, a lot of that can be blamed on my choice of base color. I thought I pulled out hot pink to go under the black. I know, I know--my nails would be the envy of ever ten year-old girl on the planet. Anyhoo, I thought I pulled out hot pink. In truth, I'd pulled out a creamy, spicy red. Oops. In my defense, it was dark, the pull cord for the light was high up, and I am short. By the time I realized my mistake, three nails were done, and I didn't feel like starting over.

Once I got the black polish painted, and the nails did their blasted thing, I decided that the black over red wasn't terrible. It wasn't embarrassing, but it was...familiar. Where had I seen this look before? Blocks of black over a sea of red? Hmmm...

Photo Credit: Broadway World

Oh, yeah.

I've been humming "A Boy Like That" for days, now. Not that that's a bad thing, or anything. As far as earworms go, this one's actually kind of--MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

The hunt for this image did lead me to a really cool Vanity Fair spread from 2009. If you've got a few minutes to spare and want to see some remarkably faithful recreations of scenes from the film version of West Side Story (with designer clothing and J.Lo, natch), I highly recommend surfing over to the site. It's an all-star cast, with the likes of Chris Evans (on the floor, right) and Robert Pattinson (back, right, with Brittany Snow) getting their 50s on.

Photo Credit: Vanity Fair

Nice Lady Giving Excellent Directions*

Tonight, I get to shoot a national commercial!! Yay!! It's for a video on demand service that's getting ready to launch. I'm not giving details, yet, but if I can find out when/where it'll air, I'll let you know.

It's a short spot, and I'll be appearing as myself, in my own clothes of my own choosing, which is awesome. I get to be comfortable, and get a little bit of exposure all at the same time. No complaints here. The thing is...I'm not a stylist. I'm also not rich and famous, so I don't have a stylist. I have one really artistic friend that I tease about becoming my stylist, but, frankly, she's way more talented than I could probably ever afford. So, to recap, I need something cool but casual to wear on national television, and have a limited budget and only one hour in the mall. Wait...wasn't that a television show?

In any case, I did what any self-respecting actress on a mission would do: I wandered blindly into the coolest store in the mall, and ambled around aimlessly, hoping something fabulous would jump into my arms. No such luck with that, but instead, I got something better.

Enter Jennifer, the wonder associate. She asked me what I was looking for ("something cool that won't make me look huge"), and within what felt like seconds, had three amazing outfits for me to try on. She even figured out my jean size just by looking at me, and I don't even know my jean size. Before too long, I was in a fantastic, layered look that was laid-back but sparkly enough to be dressy (and seriously, when have I ever turned down sparkle?). Jennifer even accessorized everything with a gorgeous belt, so it shows off my curves and waistline. I never could have come up with this outfit, and it's perfect. Jennifer, you are my hero.

So, without further ado, I give you my outfit, styled by Jennifer. All pieces are by Daytrip, and available at Buckle. I can't wait to add my fancy Guess shoes into the mix!

First, there's this unbelievably cool henley tank. It's a snake-skin print that's overlaid with tiny clear sequins, which gives it a real snake-skin effect. I have a feeling I'm going to be wearing this a lot. $25.

That gets layered underneath this beautiful and airy cream-colored slub knit tunic, inset with cream lace. The detailing at the neckline is a lot more detailed than you'd expect at this price point. The jewels are covered in silver and gold mesh, which tones down the shine for a subdued, but not matte, sparkle. $26.50

The belt is probably my favorite piece. It completely transforms the outfit from basic to bombshell. It's an ivory faux leather stretch belt, with glittering rhinestones inset in a brushed gold-tone belt buckle. It's over-the-top, but in a very good way. $14.95.

Everything's going over blue jeans, but I guess it doesn't really matter, since I'll only be shot from the waist up. The moral of today's story, kids, is don't be afraid to ask for help. Jennifer, and sales associates like her, know their stuff, and are ready and willing to help you find what you're looking for. They also deserve a little recognition from time to time. Jennifer, if you're reading this, thanks for being awesome.

*In case you're wondering about the title, my best friend's ridiculously cool daughter drew a picture for the refrigerator. It's titled, "Evil Lady Giving Wrong Directions". We have no idea.

Flying Off the Virtual Shelves: MAC Bloggers' Obsessions Review

Half of this review today is pretty much pointless, because out of the two items I have to review, one is sold out. Completely. It was only available online, and it is, as of this writing, gone. Finito. Poof. It is a late eyeshadow. It has ceased to be.

Well, shoot.

I am going to go ahead and review it, in the event it reappears in some new incarnation, or you happen to stumble upon it on ebay. That's actually a distinct possibility, come to think of it. You may even find it here before too long. Of course, none of that's a given, so this truly may be a completely unnecessary review. Or not. Oh, I hate when this happens! Darn you, limited editions!!

But I digress...

Last week, I posted that MAC Cosmetics had given nine beauty bloggers carte blanche to create a collection of eyeshadows and lipglasses (all are $14.50 and available at MAC). With a group like this one coming up with the colors, the collection was assured to be on-trend and fashion forward. Not only did it not disappoint, they can't keep it in stock! The first to go (a gorgeous emerald green eyeshadow called "Jealousy Wakes") didn't even make it 24 hours. I wasted no time in snapping up my favorites--a sparkly, orange-based red lipglass, "Sonoran Rain", and a glittery, iridescent green-tinged gunmetal eyeshadow, "Hocus Pocus"--and was able to test them out today. I took pictures, but with my not-professional-quality-in-the-least cellphone camera. They're not great, but it was the best I could do, so please bear with me. One day, I'll figure out how to take self-portraits with my nice SLR camera, but that day has not come, as of yet.

But again, I digress...

Let's start with the out-of-stock eyeshadow and get that over with. I'm actually sick that this is gone, because I'd really like to recommend it. It's, as mentioned above, a stunning gunmetal gray shadow with a glittering green tinge. Multi-colored iridescent pearls float throughout for an effect that makes me think of the scales on a mermaid's tail. No, I'm not trying to be poetic. That's really the first thing that came to mind. It's not a GREEN eyeshadow, but if you like green and need a good, versatile gray, this would be your shadow. You can use it all over for a smoky look, in the crease for definition, or as a subtle liner. I paired mine with a pale champagne pink, and was really impressed. My only gripe (other than the fact that it's, you know, gone) is that it's not as highly pigmented as most of the MAC shadows I've used in the past. Normally, my brush picks up the shadow like a magnet, but I had to layer this a bit to get the amount of color I wanted. Of course, it could have been intended to be sheer, in which case, they nailed it. Here's a really horrible, low-quality image taken in dim lighting to probably not help you even slightly:

Yep. That's a spectacularly bad photo of Hocus Pocus.

Final Verdict: 9 out of 10. I love the color, but I wish it were more pigmented.

So, moving on. The lipglass I chose is still in-stock (for now). This is a classic example of why I rarely buy makeup online without first testing out the color in person. From the pictures online (and even the one I took, myself), the product appears to have a sheer, glittery texture. In reality, the color is much more opaque, and more shimmery and shiny than glittery. It's still nice, and I really like it, but it's not what I was expecting. I ordered what I thought was a jelly and received a cream. However, I'm not holding an error on my account against the lipglass. The color is rich, creamy, and patent-leather shiny with a little gold and silver sparkle, but it's not a true red. MAC calls it a coral-red, but it's not pink enough for that description. This is almost true, Russian red, but has a tiny bit of orange to warm it up a bit. If you look good in orange, yellow, or gold, this is going to look amazing on you. My only complaint is that the lipglass is super-sticky, which would make you think that it would also be long-lasting. It's not. It didn't even come close to making it through lunch, and I even had to reapply after talking for a bit. Here, again, is an unspeakably bad picture of Sonoran Rain. I am so sorry:

I swear, my lips look much better in person. Dear God, my skin looks BLUE!

Final Verdict: 7 out of 10. It's moisturizing, shiny, and an amazing color. It just doesn't stay on worth a lick.

So, a Sea Anemone and a Plastic Boar Walk Into a Shower...



Photo Credit: Sephora

 It's officially Summer, which means--down here in the Deep South, anyway--beach holidays, an explosion of azaleas, crawfish boils, pool-side barbeques, hundred-plus degree temperatures, a thousand percent humidity, sweat-soaked hair and clothes just from walking out to the mailbox, and, at least, two showers a day.

It's hot. It's sticky. It's gross, and my skin has been paying the price.

Honestly, my blackheads were getting so out of hand that I was doing face masks way more often than is recommended, giving my extractor a workout, slathering on acne gel, and using both a regular facewash and an exfoliating scrub. I even tried a pore strip (and that's another post). I was desperate, and desperate times call for desperate measures.

Obviously, changing what I washed my face with wasn't working, so maybe I should try changing how I washed my face. I was placing a Sephora order, anyway, so I figured I'd tack on this little gem of a brush. If nothing else, it would throw me into Free Shipping territory.

First, let's hear from Sephora:

This brush's ultra-soft brush head gently exfoliates dead skin cells. Its other side features a silicone pad with tiny bristles to deeply cleanse pores while invigorating the skin. Use daily to reveal glowing, radiant skin.

Now, let's hear from me:

The brush is dual-headed, with a soft-bristled brush on one side, and super-flexible silicone sea anemone on the other. To use, I apply my facewash to my face, wet the brush side of the tool and scrub my face in a circular motion. Then, I wet the silicone side and repeat the process. I've been using this puppy for four days, and I can tell a difference. When I wash my face, it feels clean and is smooth to the touch. That's not really the norm around here. I've been able to lay off the face masks and scrubs, too, though I am still using the acne medication, but to a lesser degree. In other words, this works.

The tool isn't perfect, though. There are a couple of flaws that, while not dealbreakers for me, might be for you. First of all, the head is not flexible. The bristles are, but the head, itself, is hard, flat plastic. This makes getting the shorter silicone side into the curves around your nose very difficult. I'm okay with just using the longer brush side to reach those areas, but that's personal preference. The other gripe is the lack of hanging apparatus. Yes, there is a little hole in the handle, but unless you have a spare piece of rope to loop through it, it's not really useful for hanging. Right now, I have mine propped upright in a shower organizer, but a little soap-on-a-rope loop or even a suction cup would have been nice. For eighteen bucks, I think they could have tossed something in to keep it from getting mildewy. $18, Sephora.

Final Verdict: 8 out of 10. It's a little pricey, but talk about saving face.

I'm Taking a Personal Day

Please excuse me today, but I'm really not feeling well. In my absence, I leave you:



I hope you all have a great weekend, and I'll be back Monday with more product reviews and silliness. Pinky swear.

Thanks,
Erin

Paranormal Pop Culture on TV!!

Zak Bagans on the Set of Paranormal Challenge.
Photo Credit: Travel Channel

As some of you might know, I write a little indie-movie diary for Paranormal Pop Culture. There's a link near the right-hand bottom of the page, actually, if you want to check out some of the past posts. Well, Aaron Sagers, the founder and all-around nice guy, will be on Travel Channel's Paranormal Challenge tomorrow night (Friday) at 9/8c. Aaron has been super supportive of The Night Shift, practically since its inception, so I really hope you can all tune in to watch.

So, what is Paranormal Challenge, you ask? In short, it's a ghost hunt-off between two teams of amateur paranormal investigators. The only prize is an ego boost for the winners, and frankly, I love it. Thomas and I watched the premiere last week, and we both thought it was genius. As the teams are not professional, they're sometimes working with brand new equipment, which can lead to some humorous situations, but also to moments of brilliance. Along the way, the investigators are guided by pro and mentor Zak Bagans (Ghost Adventures) and three guest celebrity judges, who are all experts in the paranormal. That's where Aaron comes in. These judges give pointers, constructive criticism, and ample amounts of praise when deserved. It's fun, feel-good, and an eensy bit educational--but trust me, you'll be having such a good time, you won't even notice you learned anything.

Paranormal Challenge airs Friday nights at 9/8c on Travel Channel.

Let the Blogging Takeover Begin!!

Photo Credit: MAC Cosmetics

Beauty Bloggers, the Future is NOW! Gone are the days of just spouting off opinions! Here, today, the blogosphere is taking over and actually creating the makeup products of tomor--I mean, tod--that is...um...well, actually, yesterday. Huh.

Let me start over. Yesterday saw the launch of a limited edition line of MAC cosmetics, completely created by beauty bloggers. Nine very in-the-know ladies worked with the makeup juggernaut to come up with nine on-trend products that are available, like the blogs that inspired them, exclusively online.

Four eyeshadows and five lipglasses make up the Blogger' Obsessions collection, and range from baby pinks and sparkly neutrals on to vibrant greens and audacious purples. For complete lists of colors and swatches, check out this blog or this blog by two of the talented chosen nine.

All items are $14.50, and right now, you can get free shipping with the code BLOGS. Hurry, though; one eyeshadow has already sold out!!

P.S. I ordered the eyeshadow Hocus Pocus, and the lipglass Sonoran Rain. I'll have a full review of each when they come in.

A Real Eye for Disney Art

This just sort of fell in my lap this afternoon, and it was so absolutely freaking cool, I had to share it with you guys. Just look:

Photo Credit: Katie Alves

Can you believe that?! This is eye makeup inspired by Disney's Tangled, specifically the gorgeous lantern scene.

Katie is a 21 year-old artist, living in Canada. Her creations are made from normal, everyday makeup (CoverGirl, Rimmel, Halloween makeup, etc.), and usually done on herself. That, right there, is probably what impressed me the most. I consider it a good day if my liner is only slightly crooked. Her extraordinary work can be found on deviantART, and is definitely worth a look-see. Gee, I'm feeling all inspired now! Wonder where I put that blue eyeshadow?

What I Wouldn't Give for a Divination Course

Photo Credit: Blogher

Quoth the author, "Pottermore!"

I'm an avid Harry Potter fan. Actually, I think the term "rabid" might be more appropriate. I'm over half-way through book six, have seen all the movies, visited the park, toured Hogwarts, and own a replica of Hermione's wand. I've developed a much better grasp on Quidditch than I have on Football, and Thomas has taken to teasingly asking if I know where all the bathrooms are in the castle (the answer is no. However, I do know the Room of Requirement is on the fourth floor, across from a tapestry. I need help...). So, of course, I'm both freakishly excited to see the next movie, but also a little sad that it'll be the last one. Ever. Excuse me, I think I have something in my eye...

With that knowledge in mind, imagine my excitement to hear that J.K. Rowling is about to launch a website called Pottermore.com! My obsession can live on! Here's the thing, though: no one has any idea what the website will entail. All the site consists of right now are a couple of owls and a placard stating the site is coming soon. If you click on the owls, you're directed to a youtube video that I can't view on either my phone or computer at the moment, which is ennervating, to say the least. The author will make an official announcement regarding the site on June 23rd. Other than that, all we know for certain is that it will not have anything to do with another book.

So what is Pottermore? MTV has some interesting guesses, ranging from a more-than-likely videogame, on to the I-wouldn't-hold-my-breath ideas of an additional theme park or actual wizarding school. Of course, it's all speculation just now. Looks like we have to wait another week for Ms. Rowling to divulge yet another mystery.

Aren't Starlets Supposed to Be Crazy?

I've hit the wall, guys. Between getting up extra early for publicity interviews, going to bed late because we're working on something cool and movie-related that I can't divulge just yet, checking the Internet for misinformation about the screening (gee, I had no idea the movie was a 96-minute French Drama?), and calming down the people who read the incorrect information and got nervous (and, in some cases, angry), I'm a wreck. Totally at the end of my rope. Then, on top of that, Dew Drop Hamburger Day at work was postponed (if you've ever tasted a Dew Drop Inn hamburger, you understand that this is a travesty of epic proportions). This is not a good day.

Actually, it's a pretty lousy week. Father's Day is Sunday, and it's followed by the tenth anniversary of my Dad's passing on Friday. I'm definitely a Daddy's girl, so it's a veritable one-two punch to my already strained emotions. Not asking for pity; just explaining my state of mind at the moment.

So, what's a stressed-out, teary-eyed, slightly homicidal girl to do? Why, plan what she's going to wear to her movie premiere, of course! If I'm going to be crazy, I'm at least going to look good when they strap me into the straight jacket.

I'm a bargain shopper, so please excuse the craptastic quality of these photos. Nothing I'm wearing is available online, so all pics came off of my lovely little Droid, and were taken in my room. It is messy. Don't judge me.

This is a lucky find, if there ever was one. You see, I was planning to wear a different dress. It was super-cute, black and white with sleeves, and very 1960s. Then we decided to have an outdoor reception following the screening, and it's approximately 3,000 degrees in the shade down here in the ninth circ--I mean, deep South. I needed something sleeveless, and I needed it fast. It also had to be appropriate for 11:00 in the morning, which is when the film is scheduled to run. That's a bit of a tall order.

So, with zero time and even less money, I hit good old Ross Dress for Less, hoping against hope they would have something--anything--workable. The one I frequent regularly carries brands like Calvin Klein and Steve Madden, so odds were, at least, in my favor.

After about two minutes of looking, I found this gorgeous Nic & Dom dress (above left). There was only one, and it fit like it was made for me. I paid the nice cashier, and walked out with a designer dress for $16.99. A similar dress on an online discount site goes for the Nigerian equivalent of roughly $48. All in all, not a bad deal. Here's a detail shot (to the right) of the floral work on the bodice. The colors are a muted lavendar gray and matte silver lilac. 

Of course, you can't go barefoot to something like this (though I may kick off the heels if I sink into the grass too much at the reception). This is where I found my coup purchase of the outing. Guess platform stilettos in a gorgeous violet-tinted pewter. I don't want to bring up the horror that was Burlesque again, but I really did dream about these shoes. Regular price: $98. My price: $32.99. I win. I'll also accessorize with vintage and vintage-inspired jewelry, lavendar-hued makeup tones, and the coolest nailpolish I've seen in a while. If you're going, go all out. It's from Sephora by OPI, and called "It's Bouquet With Me". Sephora describes it as sheer violet with silver and holographic chunky glitter. I just call it cool beans on a stick. It's priced at $9.50, and available at Sephora.

(Left: Guess shoe. Right: Nailpolish--photo credit: Sephora)

I hope to take some pictures at the actual premiere, and if I look cute in any of them, I'll post 'em here. I'm entirely non-photogenic, so don't hold your breath. Have a great afternoon. I'm going to go try to calm down.

Keep Calm and Slather On!

Folks, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that next year, that SPF 100 sunscreen that some of you love so dearly will no longer be on shelves. I'll wait while you moan and groan. Finished? Okay. Now for the good news: it wasn't doing you any good anyway. Really.

The FDA has issued a statement that beginning in 2012, new guidelines regarding sunscreen will take effect. Believe it or not, these are all actually reasonable, and designed to keep your skin healthy while saving you money. Here's the breakdown:

Certain buzzwords can no longer be used:
SUN BLOCK--It's false advertising; no skin product can totally block out the sun.
WATER PROOF--Again, not true. The more accurate term, "water-resistant," will be used instead.
SWEAT PROOF--Another misrepresentation. The product might be difficult to sweat off, but it eventually will.

Other buzzwords have to be qualified or earned:
WATER-RESISTANT--Any product claiming this must specify if the wearer must reapply after 40 minutes (lighter formulas) or 80 minutes (heavier products).
BROAD-SPECTRUM--Products with this claim must protect from both UVA and UVB rays.

Labels will change:
NO RATINGS OVER 50--No, the FDA isn't trying to give you skin cancer. SPFs over 50 do not provide any additional protection. Seriously. They do, however, come with hefty price tags and give wearers the false sense that they don't need to reapply.

A few other changes:

• Any product that is not broad-spectrum and SPF 15 or higher will have to carry a warning label that states the product will not protect against skin cancer or early aging.
• No product can claim to work for more than two hours.
• Only products that are applied to skin by rubbing or spraying can be called "sunscreen". No wipes, makeup, body washes, or the like can use that term, regardless of SPF presence.

So, there you go. Enjoy the sun, but remember: the only safe tan is a fake tan, so slather on that sunscreen!

Zhen Shi Mei Miao*

As I mentioned yesterday, I've been on a bit of a theatre kick since watching Sunday night's unusually entertaining Tony Awards. My husband, on the other hand...eh, not so much. Don't get me wrong, he appreciates the theatre, and has even seen a couple of shows that I (*gasp!*) haven't. Not that I'm bitter. I mean, The Producers wasn't that great, right? Right? *sigh*

Anyhoo, I spent Sunday in rapt wonderment over the performances, while Thomas fiddled on the computer and played around on his phone. I mainly wanted to see the number from Anything Goes, because I played an Angel in the show a few years ago (Virtue: the easy kind, if you must know), and thought it would be fun to see how our costumes compared (nearly identical, I'm happy to report). Well, Thomas actually watched part of the act, and, when I asked him how he liked it, pointed out that it was cute, but he preferred it in Mandarin.

From that moment on, I have had an earworm of Kate Capshaw lip-synching "Anything Goes" over the Temple of Doom opening titles. Thanks, honey. Thanks heaps. So, for your listening and viewing pleasure, I give you:



Ain't that a hoot? As it turns out, today is actually the thirtieth anniversary of the franchise's first entry, Raiders of the Lost Ark. Why not celebrate by re-watching the classic. No, Indy doesn't sing, but it sure beats the heck out of outrunning boulders and avoiding snakes. Plus, I hear number five is going to happen, so we might as well get ready for it.

*Anything Goes!

Support the Bleepidy-Bleep Arts!

Who all watched the Tony's last night? Anyone? Bueller?

Right...so, for all, what, two of you who tuned in, how awesome was Neil Patrick Harris?! For those of you who missed out, the two-time host opened the evening with a show-stopping number--complete with dancing sailors, stewardesses, and (oh, why not?) nuns--that delivered the message: "Broadway! It's not just for gays anymore!" Later, he challenged Hugh Jackman to a musical hosting duel, rode in on the puppet horse from Best Play winner War Horse, and devoted a full thirty seconds to good-natured Spiderman: Turn Off the Dark bashing. Somewhere in the midst of all that, he managed to squeeze in a production number from his stint in the New York Philharmonic's concert version of Sondheim's Company. To finish off the night, he rapped a newly composed recap of the ceremony's events. I.Am.In.Awe.

Of course, the entire evening wasn't all NPH. The theatre junkie in me was positively giddy over numbers from Anything Goes (could Sutton Foster be any more adorable?) and How to Succeed in Business. I was less than impressed by the screechy Sister Act and morose Spiderman numbers, but after Norbert Leo Butz's tour de force performance, I have to check out Catch Me If You Can. The evening's best number, without question, had to be the feel-good anthem "I Believe" from The Book of Mormon. I'll be purchasing that cast album this week, if at all possible (don't judge me. Yes, I work for a church, but I also have a sense of humor. The two are not mutually exclusive). The evening also provided its own unintentional drinking game fodder, as The Motherf***** With the Hat was nominated for several awards, and presenters had to remember to censor the name for television. Most were successful. Others, not so much (Brooke Shields, I'm looking at you).

All in all, the awards rocked this year, and I'm on a performing arts high, right now. In light of that, I give you the goofiest ad I've seen in a while. It's not for a Broadway show (though you can learn about all of the nominated shows and view clips here), which would have made more sense, as I've written two full paragraphs on the Tony Awards...hmmm. Oh well, it's a blog, not the New York Times. We'll live. Instead, it's for the Royal Ballet's production of Romeo and Juliet. The British company is utilizing a different space for performances this weekend. Instead of their ususal haunt, The Royal Opera House at Covent Garden, they'll be at the O2 Arena, an enormous dome that plays host to rock concerts and seats 20,000 people. The company's regular attendees might fill 10-20% of that, so the powers-that-be decided to take drastic measures to put some butts in seats. The result: a series of ads that riff on the whole ballet-in-a-rock-arena situation. This first one is funny, informative, and just really enjoyable to watch. It's not "cool", but I got the impression the creators knew that. It's just a hoot and a half, and I hope you like it. The video won't embed, for some reason, but you can find it here.

The Swan-Cullen Affair

I thought we'd already had the wedding of the year. I thought we were done with all that nonsense. I thought wrong.

It seems I may have jumped the gun when I put away the rice and tin cans. I'd totally forgotten that 2011 played host to not just Kate and Wills big day, but also that of current pop culture "it" couple, Edward and Bella. How silly of me. My apologies...

Even worse, it appears I'm the only blogger on the planet who isn't just falling over themselves to pick apart every single eensy-weensy leaked detail of Belward's (Edwella? Edla?) impending nuptials. I mean, it's not that I don't care. It's just that...well, look at that. It is that I don't care. How 'bout that?

Honestly, I am on neutral ground as far as Twilight is concerned. My best friend adores it. My husband did a tribal dance in the living room to make the DVD go away. Personally, I don't have an opinion (well, I do have one opinion that involves sparkly vampires, but I think I'll keep it to myself). I do, however, have a blog with that's vaguely pop culture related. With that, I give you:

EVERYTHING YOU EVER WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT EDWARD AND BELLA'S UPCOMING WEDDING THAT HAS BEEN LEAKED TO THE PRESS AND NIT-PICKED TO DEATH (NO PUN INTENDED--GET IT? HE'S A VAMPIRE?)*
*but were afraid to ask

Photo Credit: MTV

Let's start with the invitations. The happy couple--oh, who are we kidding, here? The prop department selected a simple white and silver design with silver-toned engraving, minor embellishment, and a bold wax seal. This would suggest a silver and white color scheme for the wedding--with perhaps a touch of color--and a more traditional tone overall. It should also be noted that the decoration echoes the style of Bella's wedding hair adornment, which will be discussed later. The wording, which clearly states that the couple are throwing the wedding, mentions their families, but omits any mention of their names. This indicates that the couple may be chipping in on the cost of the wedding, but can also suggest a familial rift, and that perhaps the parents aren't entirely thrilled with the wedding at hand.



Photo Credit: Shine

 Next on the list: jewelry. I already mentioned Bella's hairpiece. Well, here's a picture of it (top right). It appears to be a vintage or vintage-inspired crystal filigree comb. The piece holds a traditional white veil, and seems to be placed in a low bun-hairstyle with braid detail for a classic and elegant bridal look.




The engagement ring (bottom right) was revealed earlier in Eclipse, but bears mentioning here because, not only is it a prominent piece of the bridal ensemble, but it's also available for purchase. You've got to love marketing, right? A cute, inexpensive replica is available here, and hopeful girlfriends can point their beloveds here for the real-deal diamond version.

Photo Credit: Gather

Bella's makeup is another hot topic for discussion. Gather reports that the bride will display a natural, relaxed look for the big day--one that would be equally appropriate with either a bridal gown or blue jeans. Ms. Swan will sport what appears to be a smudged steel gray eye, naturally-flushed cheeks, and a pinkish-nude lip.

Photo Credit: Celebrity Wedding Blog

The ceremony, itself, appears to be an outdoor affair (remember--sunlight only makes these vamps sparkle, and what bride wouldn't want a little extra bling on her big day?), bedecked with blossoms. The vow exchange will take place beneath a floral archway, and enormous sprays line the aisle. I can only assume Allegra will be handed out with the champagne.

So, there you have it. That's pretty much all the information I could find on the Breaking Dawn wedding. If you're interested in a Twilight-themed reception of your very own, here is a lovely article with some fabulous pictures. When done right, it makes for a gorgeous atmosphere, believe it or not. Alright. I'm done. If you need me, I'll be watching Buffy.

How Cindy Crawford Killed My Mojo: An Utterly Pointless Rant

Well, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it's time again for one of your favorite Adorable Napalm segments: The Rant.

This is not something I do often. In fact, out of 248 posts, this is only the fifth time I've felt compelled to rant and rave. That little fact actually surprised me. I was sure I carried on a lot more than that. Hmmm...

You see, when I get ready for work in the mornings, I like to leave the television on in my bedroom (don't judge me. I like the noise). Unfortunately, I don't have cable on that set, and the digital converter box and ridiculously over-priced antenna only pick up one channel consistently. That channel, dear friends, shows only infomercials for the better part of the morning. Oh, joy.

But that's not why I'm ranting. Oh, no. Nor am I complaining that they show the same five informercials in rotation, or that the station sometimes shows the same one twice in a row. No, sirreebob. I can deal with all that. What I cannot deal with is the idea that Cindy Crawford is old.

Yeah, I'll give you a second to recover from that. You just take a moment while I reset the needle that came screeching off of that record. Better now? Good. Let's continue.

Cindy Crawford is the spokesperson for Meaningful Beauty, an anti-aging skin care system created by Dr. Jean-Louis Sebagh. This infomercial airs about twice a week, give or take, and it's been grating on my nerves since its first transmission.

Before I fully dive into this rant, let me explain a few details:

1. This is not a review of Meaningful Beauty. I have never tried any of the products, so I have no idea if they work or not, nor, if I'm being totally honest, do I really care.
2. I am not against anti-aging skin products of any type. Quite the opposite, actually. I am an advocate of responsible skin care, and use anti-aging products on a daily basis.
3. I understand that the point of the informercial is to make you feel like you have to buy the product or you'll look old and your life will suck.
4. Cindy Crawford is not old. At the taping of the infomercial, she was 43 years of age.

Now that that's cleared up, we may begin.

Where in the bloody blue blazes do these people get off calling Cindy Crawford old?!?! Okay, so maybe 49 year-old host Valerie Bertinelli doesn't come right out and use the word "old" (which would be hypocritical), but it's more than implied by the awed gasps and looks of sheer wonderment when her age is revealed. Dear God, they act like the woman is the freaking cryptkeeper.

Forty-three is not old. It's barely middle-aged.

I know, this is an infomercial to sell anti-aging products. It's in the best interest of marketing to make it sound like their genetically-blessed supermodel spokesperson should be on Social Security. Really, it reminds me of some advice a friend gave me once: Lie up. Never lie that you're younger than you actually are. Lie that you're older. That way, people think you look amazing for your age. Obviously, the company can't lie about Cindy Crawford's age because it's way too easy to find out the truth (thanks, Internets). What they can do is ooh and aah over someone looking so young at such an advanced age.

How demoralizing is that?! This is beyond manipulative. It's downright evil. Cindy Crawford is so genetically-blessed, she's practically mutant. If she needs this stuff at forty-three, how is a forty-four year old average Jane supposed to compete?

But this rant is not just about this infomercial. That's just a symptom of the bigger problem that is our culture's obsession with youth. American Idol now allows 15 year-olds to enter, and cuts off at age twenty-eight. The most recent winner was only seventeen. The Metropolitan Opera competition lowered its max age to thirty. As a singer, I cringe at these numbers. A woman's voice doesn't mature until she's well into her thirties, which makes cutting off an opera competition at thirty seem utterly ludicrous to me. As for AI...well, I could say a lot, but I won't. What I will say is that it came at no surprise to me that one of the finalists oversang to the point that she blew out her voice and had to have a doctor come onstage and explain her vocal fatigue to the audience. I'm not saying you can't be phenomenal at so young an age, but the training and technique that only comes with years of study just isn't there, and you need that to pull off that level and intensity of rehearsal and performance. With acting...well, you can never be too young, right?

But it's not just the performing arts, and that's what has me freaking out. According to CareerBuilder (via MSN), the average length of unemployment for job seekers age 16-24 in 2009 was 19.9 weeks. Ages 25-54 had to pound the pavement for 25.3 weeks, while those 55 and older were out of work a staggering 29.5 weeks. The gist of their advice: look younger.

Folks, words fail me.

I really wanted to end this on a positive note. I wanted to rise up and defiantly proclaim that I will not let society dictate my place in this world based on my age or how I look; that I will be true to myself, and my experience and wisdom will triumph over adversity, but I can't.

I will say that as long as Lady Clairol makes hair dye, I will remain a gray-less redhead--not because it makes me look younger, but because I like it; that I use my anti-aging products not because I don't want to look my age, but because I want to have clear, pretty skin well into my golden years. However, I have to admit I think it's a kick when someone is surprised by my actual age. I adore getting carded. I also have to give into the craze a little bit because I'm an actor, and it's part of the biz.

I have no ending for this. I suspect that's partially because it is the way it is and there's nothing I can do about it. That, right there, makes me crazy. All I can do at this point is stop typing.

Let The Sunshine In: VS Beach Sexy Instant Self Tan Lotion with Tint

Photo Credit: Kimber's Beauty Corner

As I mentioned yesterday, Monday was my birthday (yes, I'm a D-Day baby, just several decades after the fact). To celebrate, I spent Sunday hanging around my Mom's gorgeous pool, enjoying the fact that my diet seems to be working and I could wear a cute two piece with no real shame. My brother didn't even make fun of me. That, right there, was a fabulous birthday gift.

Of course, as I've explained numerous times, I am black-light friendly white. Recently, I reviewed the airbrush bronzer from Victoria's Secret, but, amazing as it is, it washes off. I didn't know if pool water would take it off (and didn't really want to find out the hard way), so I opted to use their Beach Sexy Instant Self Tan Lotion with Tint. I normally use another drugstore brand, but was so impressed with the VS airbrush that I had to give this a whirl.

I am so glad I did.

This is, hands down, the best self-tanner I have ever used, and I'm an old pageant girl, so I've been around the tanning block. Normally, self-tanners smell atrocious, transfer on clothing (especially in this god-forsaken humidity), and tend to streak, so you need a shower and a possible second coat to even things out. Since I had an event on Friday, I thought it best to apply the product on Thursday, so I could worry about damage control on Friday. In the event of disaster, I had a spare bottle of airbrush tan to get me through, and I could use the old standby for my birthday bash.

So, Thursday morning, before work, I showered, shaved, exfoliated, and did all those other fun things you have to do before you self-tan. After I slathered on some moisturizer to make sure the tanner went on smoothly, I grabbed the bottle and set to work.

The first thing I noticed what actually what I didn't notice. There was almost zero tanner smell. In fact, the fragrance was actually quite pleasant. There also weren't chunks of glitter peppering my skin; just a soft gleam. Already, I was impressed.

The tanner applied almost effortlessly, and left a light tint so I could see where the product was, and catch any missed spots easily. I think the entire application process took about five minutes, then I let it dry for about ten (the instructions say five, but why chance it?) while I put on makeup and fixed my hair. So far, so good.

The heat and humidity were excruciatingly high that day. By the time I got home from work, I was terrified that I was going to have bronzed clothing and underwear from all the transfer that had surely occurred. Um...no. The only transfer I noted was on the inside of my bra, where the underwires come together in the center. That was it, and even that was minimal.

Friday morning, I did do a second coat, just to darken up a bit, since I didn't have to worry about the smell. There were no streaks on either attempt, and the color was a gorgeous, natural bronze. No oompa-loompas here! Sunday morning, I slapped on one more coat, since the original application had started to fade slightly. I didn't have time to moisturize first, but the application was still very even with no streaks.

I can't recommend this enough. Plus, at only $12, it's one of the least expensive tanners on the market. Give it a shot. You won't be sorry. $12, Victoria's Secret.

Final Verdict: 10 out of 10. There's nothing I'd change about this, if I could. Utterly amazing.

Oh, Good Lord

Photo Credit: Smashbox

As if I wasn't addicted to Facebook enough, now Smashbox has to go and get in on the whole "social media" thingy. Great. I am in so.much.trouble...

Smashbox introduced Social Shop yesterday morning. From the Smashbox site, you can connect to Facebook and create your own Like/Want list, and find out what other Smashbox fans think about your favorite products. Considering that, up until now, there were no product reviews on the Smashbox website, this is a welcome feature for me. Granted, most of the comments thus far consist of your basic, "OMG I <3 THIS!!", but a few give real opinions and tips. It's a definite step in the right direction.

Also, if you sign up for Social Shop and "Like" Smashbox on Facebook, you'll be entered for a chance to win your Like/Want list (up to $100). Now, that's a beautiful deal.

How Much Longer Till AARP?

It's my birthday!!! I'm old!!!

Yep, it's official. I am now "over thirty". I am "in my thirties". Yay? Well, it beats the alternative, I suppose.

It's said that with age comes wisdom. Normally, I'd argue that I've met plenty of folks who could be categorized as both ignorant and elderly, but this particular birthday has proven to be a learning experience. For instance, in the past twenty-four hours, I have learned:

• A coke bottle, if dropped at just the right angle, can cause a major explosion that rattles windows and causes people to run for cover, and a two-liter coke bottle contains enough liquid to cover the floor, walls, furniture, and ceilings of two rooms, and still have a little bit left in the bottle.

• Jefferson Davis' birthday is a state holiday in Alabama. It's celebrated on the first Monday in June, and all government offices, including the DMV, are closed. My license expires tomorrow.

but most importantly:

• People give you free stuff.

Seriously. Here is a sampling of some of the freebies that you, too, can enjoy on your womb-eviction day:

Starbucks: register any reloadable gift card at Starbucks.com, and receive a free drink of your choice as a birthday gift. You won't actually get it on your special day, but a coupon will be mailed to you sometime around that date.

Lenny's Sub Shop: sign up for the Substantial Rewards program and receive a coupon for a free regular sized sub on your birthday.

Sephora: sign up for the Beauty Insider program and receive a special gift with purchase during the four weeks surrounding your birthday. This year, it's Philosophy Shampoo, Shower Gel and Bubble Bath in Vanilla Cupcake.

Smashbox: sign up for Pretty Points and receive a special gift with purchase during your birth month. This year it's a cream blush and lipgloss in a little clear pouch.

Skechers: join the VIP club, and receive 15% off any purchase on your birthday.

Those are some of the best offers I've found, and they won't spam your inbox (maybe one email a week from each). I'll try to update this list as I learn about new offers.

Maybe getting older and wiser is more fun that I thought.

And the Winner Is....

Magnolia!!

Granted, she was the only one who entered...but that doesn't make her entry any less cool! Actually, even if we'd had dozens of entries, this one still would have caught my attention, and possibly even won! It's really quite impressive.

So, without further ado, I give you: Magnolia's CHALLENGE! Winning Entry!

First, a reminder of the amazing six-dollar dress:

Photo Credit: Old Navy

The challenge was to accessorize the dress so that it would be suitable for a casual cocktail party. You see, my birthday is coming up (faster than I'd like), and while I'm not having a throwdown party, I am having dinner with a few close friends. This is the dress I'm planning to wear, and folks, I was stumped. I now have a clue what to do, and I'd like to thank Magnolia for all of her help. Now, onto the winning design!

Photo Credit: The Limited

I love this necklace. The strands are so delicate, but the stones make a strong statement. This is a confident, rockin' piece, but also one that's casual enough for a poolside BBQ. $32.90, The Limited.

Photo Credit: The Limited

What would the necklace be without matching earrings? These provide just enough laid-back sparkle to compliment a loose Summer up-do. $19.90, The Limited.

Photo Credit: J. Crew

These shoes come in black and rose, as well, but I love how the metallic mushroom plays off of the natural colored stones in the jewelry. It's also close enough to skin tone to elongate legs. Plus, nothing says Summer like a flip-flop, and these are just dressy enough. $26.50, J. Crew.

Congratulations, Magnolia!! Now, I just need to go shopping...Happy Birthday to me!

Red Face, Black Dress

Photo Credit: NewlyMaid

Maawage is what bwings us toogever today. It's also what drives seemingly normal women off of veritable cliffs of insanity over things like table linens and floral arrangements, and causes them to view rhinestone encrusted stretch satin as a viable fashion option. But I've said this before.

The cliche of the ugly bridesmaid's dress is a cliche for a reason: it's the rule, not the exception. Right now, I'm singing for, literally, a wedding a week (Yay! Money!), and ratio of good vs. downright evil gowns is in an extreme tilt to the dark side. Now, in the past, ugly bridesmaid's dresses have been relegated to Halloween costume fodder, thrift store stock, or simply banished to the netheregions of the closet. Now, I'm happy to report, that doesn't have to be the case.

NewlyMaid is a online dress shop with a unique purpose: trade in your old gown for a new little black dress. The process is simple. Sign up, request a pre-paid mailer, and send in your dress. Once it's been approved (there are guidelines on the site), you'll receive an email with your special pricing, and can pick out and order a dress from NewlyMaid's selection of LBDs. Your bridesmaid's dress will either be recycled or donated to charity.

Please note, I didn't say that you get a free dress. You receive "special pricing" on the dress of your choice. There are currently six dresses available, ranging in price from $165-$200. Once you've submitted a gown, the prices are discounted about $70-$75. It's not a free treat, but it definitely takes some of the sting out of an embarrassing situation.

*Don't forget about the Adorable Napalm CHALLENGE! Comment on yesterday's post (by noon today) with styling ideas for my LBD, and win a cheesy graphic, handmade by little ol' me! 
**UPDATE! The contest is over, and the winner is Magnolia!! Her prize will be sent to her shortly. I'm sure she's just bursting with anticipation...

Nothing To See Here. Move Along.

Okay, so you know how I said today we would showcase Magnolia's awesome styling abilities? Well....

It seems the blog is experiencing technical difficulties. As in, I can't keep a connection long enough to post the pictures. Soooooo, we're going to put this off until Monday, when, hopefully, things are back to normal. If the problem clears up before then, maybe I can put it up this weekend. We shall see.

Thanks for understanding!

Love,
Erin

Challenge--For YOU!!

Okay, folks, I have a challenge for you. *cue evil laughter*

This weekend, I purchased this dress for $6 at Old Navy. Well, technically, I got it for two dollars and some change because I had a gift card, but why quibble? Six dollar dress. Awesome.

Photo Credit: Old Navy

Here's the challenge: I need you to accessorize it for me. Post your best ideas in the comments section (with links, if at all possible), and I'll announce a winner Thursday afternoon. The winner will receive this glorious, one-of-a-kind, suitable for framing, fine Corinthian graphic to post on their own blog or website.

Lovingly crafted by moi in MS Paint

The dress is solid black, jersey knit, wth an elastic waistband and spaghetti straps. The occasion would be a casual cocktail party (think hoity-toity cook-out). Have fun and good luck! I can't wait to see what you guys come up with!


****UPDATE!!!! Congratulations to Magnolia! I'll send you a JPEG of your prize shortly. Stay tuned tomorrow for a post showing off her mad styling skillz. Yo. Alright, I'll stop now.****